Script Tutorial

·         Brilliant concept – really intriguing and an excellent idea for a 30-minute arthouse film. Also looks very achievable and I’m confident the audience will quickly get the narrative.

·         The only location that might be tricky is the hospital (although Daniel may come in here!) But if you can film in an actual hospital it will add greatly to the overall effect.

·         The only scene I don’t quite get is the McDonald’s bit – what does it add to the narrative or tell the audience? Will you have music over any of these scenes?

·         A couple of other comments: the script looks a little short for three minutes? Generally the Hollywood rule is one page a minute so in that sense you’re absolutely fine but each scene seems pretty short… it’s not a major concern as it can be a few seconds under no problem (2min 45secs is fine).

·         Finally, the final conversation feels very important but is currently set outside (park) – how will you make sure the audio is good enough here? Also, is it worth adding a couple of lines to this last conversation to hint further at where the film may be going?

Next steps

•  We are going to take out the irrelevant and unfitting scene where our lead actor goes to Mcdonald's and comes out; it will mislead the audience. 
• Also, with our script being short, we thought of adding more lines when we acting so it can be a little longer
• Lastly, we thought to make our film look more creative and professional with the different variety of shot types and angles.